Have you ever found yourself accountable for delivering project outcomes but without the formal authority to make decisions? It’s a common challenge for project leaders, especially external advisors, who often work in environments where 100% of the team doesn’t report directly to us.
The good news?
Success doesn’t depend on authority—it can be built by developing your own *personal power*: your ability to influence through trust, credibility, and relationships.
Why Personal Power Matters
Personal Power is ‘personal.’ It comes directly from you. You have control. Your skill and expertise, but also your emotional intelligence and capacity to build productive relationships, contribute to your personal power. Research shows that personal power is more sustainable and impactful than formal leadership power, which is tied to title or hierarchy.
Unlike formal authority, which can be compliance-driven, personal power encourages commitment and discretionary effort. Leaders with personal power inspire their teams to contribute to project success willingly.
So, how do we build our own personal power-especially when facing a project management challenge in fast-paced environments like project management in retail?
Mastering Emotional Reactions
Personal power begins with self-awareness and emotional mastery. As leaders, our ability to remain composed in challenging situations directly impacts how others perceive us and the way we process this is where emotional skills and mind brain emotion awareness come into play.
Jonathan Haidt, psychologist and Professor of Ethical Leadership at New York University, likens the relationship between our emotional and rational minds to that between an elephant and its rider.
The rider (our rational mind) is notionally in charge of where the pair are going, but as soon as the elephant’s attention is captured (our emotional mind), the rider quickly finds out how little control they have. The signal from the reins is soon lost in the noise of a trumpeting giant charging off to fulfil a primal need.
When we let our emotions take control, the results are not usually what our better selves are striving for. For example, I once pushed a team who were already stretched a little too hard on a deliverable, letting frustration seep into my tone.
The result? They shut down, there was upset, and more emotions surfaced on their side.
The recovery required an apology and a reset, but the reminder for me was to recognise my own physical reaction in the moment.
I could feel the rising frustration, an emotional reaction triggered in the moment that required pause and awareness.
Sometimes we refer to “gut instinct” – this feeling that tells us we’re having an emotional reaction. It’s actually a physiological response, linked to the vagus nerve, which connects the brain and gut.
Learning to pause, breathe, and ask myself “Why am I having this reaction?” has helped me remain calm when others are not. It’s a real-time practice of how to take control of emotions, acknowledging that emotions are reactions triggered by events or thoughts. Unlike formal authority, which can be compliance-driven, personal power fosters commitment and discretionary effort. Leaders with personal power inspire their teams to willingly contribute to project success.
What triggered them?
How did they manifest physically? Where did you feel it? For example, I sometimes feel a prickling sensation on my skin, and it feels like time is slowing down.
What was your reaction? Did you let the elephant into your tone of voice like I did?
Sit with this for a bit or mull it over next time you’re taking a walk, run, bike ride, or whatever you do. Practising this helps with how to control your mind and emotions, even during high-pressure moments.
There’s research for this too; walking (and parallel processing) has long been a habit of thinkers and creators. Hemingway, Wordsworth, Woolf and Jobs are all fans of the walk and process.
Use your reflection to strengthen and master your reactions. Less cleaning up after the elephants have run riot all over the place!
Focus on your Circle of Control
Effective leaders concentrate their energy on what they can control rather than what’s beyond their reach—a principle supported by leadership studies.
Recently, a vendor ran significantly late on a new feature delivery for a project I’m working on. I couldn’t speed up their development process or get them more people.
Instead, I focused on secure internal communication, reallocating tasks, and preparing anything that was not dependent on their delivery.
Creating a simple “What’s in my control vs. What’s not in my control” list can be surprisingly cathartic. It only requires 5-10 mins and a piece of paper (or a new document) to get it out on the page. Just make sure it’s not a page where it’s too easy for you to press send before you’ve had a moment to sleep on it and let the first reaction subside.
This exercise helps me redirect energy toward productive action, allowing me to maintain focus on what’s achievable.
Energy is a finite resource, and spending it where you can make a difference on the controllable aspects of your project will give you a greater sense of satisfaction.
Redirecting mind energy toward achievable outcomes is essential in any project management challenge. Spend a smaller amount of time keeping an eye on risks that might escalate. They need to be handled, too.
Build Credibility through Consistency
Credibility is the cornerstone of influence, it grows when your actions consistently align with your words. This kind of consistency in action fosters trust across your management team and project stakeholders alike.
For me, this is about keeping promises and being transparent about the challenges of a project as well as looking for the successes the team have created. Teams trust leaders who acknowledge difficulties while remaining positive about creating solutions. This is just as true for a retail team member as it is for a senior consultant.
“Well, as long as it all goes to plan…” a sponsor said to me as we were finishing a call.
I had to clarify, “The plan is unlikely to unfold perfectly without hiccups. There will be bumps, but we’ll figure them out together.” This honest yet positive response is reassuring without pretending that all will go smoothly, something retail leaders and client-facing roles understand well.
Tip: Make one small promise this week- something small but that will make a difference—and follow through on it (no excuses). This kind of progress builds trust over time.
Final Thoughts: Influence Over Authority
Leadership isn’t about having formal authority; it’s about earning influence through trust and credibility. Working to master your reactions, focus on what you can control, and stay consistent in your words and deeds, you’ll develop personal power that doesn’t need titles or hierarchy.
What action will you take this week to strengthen your personal power? Whether you’re leading a retail team or driving b2b success, influence begins from within.
If you are interested in more insights into project leadership, subscribe to my YouTube channel for tips on building influence as a project leader or download the Influence without Authority Guide today.
Resources Mentioned
Momentum by Leonie McCarthy
Influence Without Authority Guide
Project Management Institute resources on influence-building techniques www.pmi.org/learning/library/influencing-without-authority-project-requirements-8100
Forbes article: “5 Ways to Influence Without Authority” www.forbes.com/sites/ellevate/2018/10/08/5-ways-to-influence-without-authority/
Walking vs Sitting: www.news.stanford.edu/stories/2014/04/walking-vs-sitting-042414
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Ready to take your influence skills to the next level? Start by downloading the Influence Without Authority Guide today! And if you want personalised support in building credibility as a project leader, consider booking a one-on-one coaching session with me, where we can tailor strategies to your unique challenges and goals.
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About Leonie McCarthy
As an external project advisor and leader, I’ve spent my career helping businesses of all sizes deliver successful projects, even when they lack formal authority. I’ve learned that project success depends far more on influence skills than on a job title. In my book, *Momentum*, I share insights and examples from my experiences – like the fashion retailer who suffered a 25% drop in Christmas trade due to a poorly implemented ERP system, versus the company who embraced an “express” implementation and achieved their growth plans. I leverage these real-world scenarios to train project leaders on how to build high-performing teams, create shared purpose, and drive action, regardless of their position within the organization.
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Connect with Leonie McCarthy
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